A new agency – the Consumer Financial Protection Bureau – will be created to monitor consumer banking. The implications for debit and credit cards are described vaguely (at best) so we asked Michael Davis of Credit Card Forum to clarify:

“To be perfectly honest, we don’t yet know the exact changes that will occur as a result of this new legislation. What we do know is that swipe fees on debit cards will eventually be capped by this new bureau.”

While capping swipe fees may sound like a benefit for consumers, Davis goes on to explain the potential negative implications this may have:

“What consumers need to remember is that swipe fees charged on debit and credit cards are what make rewards possible. If the swipe fees are capped, you can bet that cash back credit cards will drastically scale back their rewards. However as of right now, it sounds like they will only be capping debit card swipe fees.”

Davis does go on to say however that there are a number of positive changes for consumers. For example, we will soon have free access to our credit score once per year (currently we can only get our credit report for free once per year). The bureau will also be responsible for enforcing the Credit Card Reform Act that recently went into full effect this year.

Traders see increased demand for Oxbow’s major export, cattle, now that the conservative minority government has shut down legislation to prevent the sale of cattle fed with oil-tainted wheat.

The Oxbow area is world-famous for it’s “oil wheat”, a special strain of pollution resistant wheat that grows only in West Dakota.

Outside groups had been lobbying the government to prevent the sale of beef from the Oxbow region, under the wrong-headed belief that chemicals from the oil will find their way into the human food chain.

Leading researchers have long believed that consumption of beef fed with oil wheat can lead to birth defects in the unborn and chronic anal bleeding in young children.

Oxbow’s leading cattle production, GenenCow, reiterated it position that all oil wheat products and animals fed with oil wheat are 103% safe for human consumption.  The extra 3% safety, according to GenenCow’s press release, is caused by an increase in daily consumption of awesome.